Have you ever met one of those know-it-all vegetarian types who try to make you feel like a careless prick because you choose to allow meat to be the mainstay in your diet?
They twist your words to portray you as a killer of innocent storybook animals – tiny little chicks, cute bunnies, and the like.

Vegetarians rattle off statistics on the amount of meat that is devoured by “people like you” and the quantity of carcinogens from the un-natural hormone injected meat products that you consume daily.

They describe how meat remains undigested in your colon – FOREVER and how it’s all killing you “Before your time”.

I’m sure you have a few annoying friends who do that to you, huh?  Well, I think we all do.  It gets so tiring.

Imagine being on the other side of that debate.
That’s where I am.

Today, as I prepare my Sunday dinner, I realize that most of you could never let what I’m preparing sit as the main entree on their dinner table:  A Large Well-Seasoned Baking Dish Full of Roasted Root Vegetables served with Meat Free Burgers.

Yep, for the most part, I DON’T EAT MEAT.

Most people whom I associate with don’t really know this about me, but when they find out, I’m constantly answering these questions:

“What’s THAT?” – as they point to whatever I’m eating.

“I didn’t know that you didn’t eat meat!?!”

“Mmmm, THAT looks good!  Can I taste it?”

“If you don’t eat meat, how do you get your dietary protein?”

“What’s wrong with you?” Followed by: “I’ve gotta eat meat or I couldn’t survive!”

Currently, there are only about 5% of the US population who consider themselves to be vegetarians, non-meat eaters, or followers of some form of a vegetarian diet.
Thus, our need to defend our diet choices occurs much more often than it does for you.

Meat eaters in the United States greatly outnumber Non-meat eaters by over 95%.
Meat eaters Rule! — Or at least that’s what you want us to believe.

For more than half of my life – in some form or another, I have been a non-meat eater.
I don’t tell many people THAT and I try not to refer to myself a Vegetarian.
Because, for all intents and purposes, I AM NOT A VEGETARIAN.
If bluntly asked, I may answer: “Yes, I’m a VegHead”, but that’s simply because most people are so uneducated about those of us who don’t eat meat that it really doesn’t matter how I answer or what I say.

I’ve found that few individuals know what being a true Vegetarian means.
Most don’t know what Vegetarianism involves, and even less have any understanding of the various types of Vegetarian and non-meat diets.

When I meet friends for meals or dates, I usually avoid the whole “I don’t eat meat” conversation.
When I go to dinners or parties at friends’ homes, I skip over making the announcement of my non-meat preferences.
If ever I attend a catered RSVP function, i.e., a wedding or a formal event,  I rarely “check” the VEGETARIAN meal choice.
When I fly on a plane or attend a conference serving lunch or dinner, I do not request the “Special Meal”.

WHY?
My answer is simple: Most People Just Don’t “GET IT”.
The whole concept of not eating meat can figuratively burn a hole in a meat eaters stomach.
Offering an explanation is more trouble than it’s worth.
You see,
– Just because I don’t eat meat, does not mean that I cannot eat in a traditional restaurant. I can pretty much eat anywhere choose.  I just have to be comfortable in asking the chef to change things or make creative choices for myself.
– Just because I don’t eat meat does not mean that when you and I go out to a restaurant that I need your help to choose my meal. Please, YOU worry about what YOU are going to order and allow ME to decide what I want.  My “crazy” diet doesn’t mean that I need you to read the menu to me nor does it mean that all I will eat are plain, limp salads.
– For breakfast, I prefer to eat more than just a cafeteria sized scoop of pasty oatmeal with a few old, dried up raisins stirred in for “flavor”.
– No, I don’t LIKE meat. But that doesn’t mean that I am able to function on a lunch consisting of only half of a too-ripe-tomato seasoned with salt and pepper and served with a pack of stale saltine crackers.
– A dinner consisting of just some shreds of iceberg lettuce and lemon juice dressing is NOT a sustainable meal for me.

I agree.  My diet choices are a little different.
Yes, I do eat dairy — cheese and milk products, but I would never drink a glass of milk and rarely eat ice cream or yogurt.
Sometimes, I eat foods that are made with meat broths and eggs, but I don’t generally seek those items for main meal choices.
I often eat seafood. I frequently enjoy fish, shrimp, as well as other shellfish and water or ocean dwellers.
I’m no Dummy.  Yes, I know that THEY are Animals and that THEY are considered MEAT.
What I’m telling you is that I’m just a different type of eater.
Vegetarian?  No, Not really.  Instead, I would say that I’m closer to a Pescetarian than anything.
A what?

Pescetarianism (pron.: /ˌpɛskɨˈtɛəriən/) (also spelled pescatarianism) is the practice of a diet that includes seafood but not the flesh of other animals. A pescetarian diet shares many of its components with a vegetarian diet and includes vegetables, fruit, nuts, grains, beans, eggs, and dairy, but unlike a vegetarian diet also includes fish and shellfish.

What I’m trying to explain here is that you are surrounded by many, many, many types of non-meat eaters and so-called “Vegetarians”.
My reasons for not eating meat are not the usual reasons that most of you would assume.

Plenty of the “PETA-following-tree-huggers” normally recognize much stricter dietary rules.  However, my concern is not for the “poor-little-helpless-critters” nor is it for the adorable talking farm animals that you read about as you prepare your children for bedtime.

Even though I don’t want to eat those cute little animals, I’m definitely not going to stand in your way while you chow down on them.
My reason for not eating meat is simple:  Typically, I find that meat just plain ‘ole “Grosses me out”.
It’s not really a ‘flavor’ thing, it’s more of a ‘texture’ thing.
The thought of eating a thick, juicy steak, a medium rare hamburger, or a pan-seared pork chop just doesn’t suit me.
The texture of meat being chewed between my teeth is just weird for me.

My problem?
I cut it up.
I take a bite.
I start chewing.
I chew and chew and chew.
As I chew, the meat gets soft and rubbery in my mouth.
And then it starts to get a little weird.
I get the feeling that I’ve bitten into a wet cellulose sponge.
And as I chew, it begins to get spongier, spongier, and spongier.
It gets bigger and bigger and bigger between my teeth until finally it starts to break down.
But by the time it starts breaking down, I’m already weirded out and I’m asking myself: What am I eating and why am I eating it?
This struggle has existed with me for most of my life.
Meat = Weird.
Funny.  I’ve let others determine the food and diet choices that I’ve made throughout life.
First, it was my Parents who made me eat meat, then, it was my peers who seem to know nothing other than the carnivorous lifestyle.
Like most people, at one time or another, I’ve allowed TV commercials and corporate advertising campaigns choose the food and drinks that I’ve consumed.
“Beef: It’s what’s for dinner.”
“Pork: The other white meat.”
“Got Milk?”

Even the Chicken commercials go on and on about No-Added Hormones, and No Yellow Dyes to trick us into thinking that the poor little chicken was healthy right up until the moment when her little neck was rung.

Finally, after much soul-searching and a little investigation, I have determined that I can eat whatever I want to eat. And with that: I choose: NO MEAT!

My Slogan: “Meat: it’s Gross and Disgusting! — Except for Deliciously, Crispy Bacon, of which I will NEVER give up, UNLESS you peel it out of my cold greasy little dead fingers!”
… And THAT, my friend, is a whole ‘nother topic of conversation!

My moral here: You eat YOUR food and Let me eat mine.

Bon Appétit